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Lisa Daily
Lisa Daily writes a syndicated dating and relationships column that appears on between 75 -150 women's and relationships websites each month, in One2One Magazine and in college newspapers nationwide. She is also a dating coach and popular media guest. Lisa followed the methods of her book and met and married the man of her dreams in less than three years, after he proposed to her on the top of the Eiffel Tower. They live in Minneapolis, MN with their three-year old son. Lisa's favorite pedicure treat is OPI's Red Red Rhine.
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Guys Perspective
Chatting Online
Chatting Online
By Lisa Daily

Dear Lisa,

I have been chatting online to a notorious NBA player for over year, who lives near me, and who is married.  We started chatting as friends.  We haven't met in person, but I went to one of his games and he noticed me. Heís called me one time, and confessed heíd driven by my house.  Heís a bible thumper, follows the bible literally, and says heís happy with his marriage.  The last thing I want to be is a home-wrecker.

He pushes away from me because he thinks heís getting too close.  Heís ignored me for weeks and then popped back into my life.  I absolutely agree with his protocol, but I find myself already in love with him. I am obsessed with him.  Heís playing with my emotions and says he can't stop thinking about me.   He says he would meet me face to face but heís afraid we might hook up.  I don't know what to do.  I really like him and always wonder if I have a chance.

Bouncing Around

Dear Bouncing,

This guy is an E! True Hollywood Story just waiting to happen.

That is, assuming heís the real deal, and not some 13-year-old kid yanking your chain from his basement in Dubuque, Iowa.

You asked me if I think you have a chance.  You have a chance, alright:  The chance to become the next Monica Lewinsky. 

Sweetie, if thereís a Mrs., heís Mr. Wrong.  You said yourself that you donít want to be a home-wrecker, so donít.  Nothing good can come of dating a married man.  Even if he left his wife, (he wonít) and married you, (he wonít) your relationship with him would have a less than 5% chance of surviving for just one year.  (After which, he would likely get right back into his old patterns and start screwing around on you.)

Not to mention the two of you would be responsible for screwing up the lives of at least three people Ė more if kids are involved.

 You may agree with his protocol, but I think it sucks.  If heís married, he shouldnít be flirting with women in chat rooms.  He shouldnít be calling the women he meets in chat rooms. And he most certainly should not be doing late night drive-byís.

Hereís my advice to you:  Cut off all contact with him immediately.

As far as the bible thumping goes, Iím pretty sure thereís more than one passage in the good book about being faithful and honorable to your wife.  Maybe he has a different version than Iím familiar with, but the book heís thumping sounds more like one you might pick up in a convenience store in a plain brown wrapper.


Dear Lisa

I like this guy a lot.  I call him, but he doesn't call me, and every time I call him he always wants to hang up quick. I was wondering, is there a way I can get him wrapped around my finger? Also do you have to be beautiful in order to have a cute guy fall in love with you?

Need a Calling Plan

Dear Calling Plan,

First, do you have to be beautiful in order for a cute guy to fall for you?  No.

As for your phone issues:  Never call him first, and never return his calls.  Why? In order for this guy to be truly intrigued by you, youíll have to let him do the pursuing.  Heíll be the one thinking of you, and thinking of a good reason to call you. Heíll be the one planning what to say, and wondering if you really want to talk to him.  Best of all, every time you talk on the phone, it will be because he wants to talk to you.  Youíll never catch him at a bad time, or when heís in the middle of clipping his nose hairs or watching wrestle-mania, so youíll always have his full attention and desire.

And as for how to get a guy wrapped around your finger, yes, I do know how to do that, but itís WAY too much information to squeeze into one tiny little column.  If you want to know all of my man-snagging secrets, youíll have to read Stop Getting Dumped!


 Dating expert Lisa Daily is the author of Stop Getting Dumped! 
Available at and bookstores everywhere.
Got a dating question?  Ask Lisa at:


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